Conscious Parenting

SMACKING IS ILLEGAL, ITS TIME TO BECOME A CONSCIOUS PARENT!

Conscious Parenting provides an alternative to smacking your child, which has now become illegal in South Africa.  Judge Raylene Keightley passed the ground-breaking ruling in the Gauteng High Court  in October 2017 encouraging parents to find alternative methods of discipline.

Conscious Parenting advocates gentle positive discipline that sees the child as an individual. According to Dr Shefali Tsabary (Author of The Conscious Parent) A Conscious Parent is not one who seeks to fix her child or seek to produce the perfect child. This is not about Perfection! A conscious parent understands that this journey has been undertaken and this child had been called forth to raise the parent itself, to show the parent where the parent has yet to grow. This is why we call our children into our lives. It may seem a daunting task to confront the self, but this is the portal to your authenticity.  (more…)

  Shenaaz Moos   Dec 31, 2017   Authenticity, Conscious Parenting, Family   0 Comment Read More

POTHOLES AND CRACKED IPHONES

You are probably wandering what potholes and cracked phone screens have in common. They are both imperfections and are very much in your face. Once I noticed one pothole in my road, the others just became visible and every time I left my house they taunted me. I was forced to endure a cracked phone for a month and was a true test of my evolution as a recovering perfectionist.

The general definition by WIKI is “Perfectionists strain compulsively and unceasingly toward unobtainable goals, and measure their self-worth by productivity and accomplishment. Pressuring oneself to achieve unrealistic goals inevitably sets the person up for disappointment. Perfectionists tend to be harsh critics of themselves when they fail to meet their standards.”

(more…)

  Shenaaz Moos   Oct 22, 2017   Conscious Parenting, Family, Perfectionism   0 Comment Read More

Subject Choice is Not Life Choice

My 15 year old daughter is in grade 9 and we attended her Subject Choice meeting the other night. As I looked around the hall, parents were holding their breathe in fear and children were anxiously scanning the room for comfort. All the parents were listening attentively to the guest speaker about the different academic streams open to specific subject choices.

(more…)

  Shenaaz Moos   Aug 26, 2017   Conscious Parenting, Emotionally Connecting   0 Comment Read More

IS IT TOO LATE TO SAY SORRY?

The answer is No, it’s never too late to say sorry. I know it is a Justin Bieber song but also the title of this blog post which I felt was an important one to share.  I wish I had the knowledge I have now when my teens were younger, but unfortunately ten years ago I didn’t and as a result made many, many and many more mistakes as a parent. When we parent from an unconscious place, we have no road map providing us with guidance to ensure that we don’t harm, scar and damage our children in our effort to raise balanced healthy adults one day. I can only forgive myself and try to do better with the knowledge I have in the present moment.

 

(more…)

  Shenaaz Moos   Mar 16, 2017   Conscious Parenting, Emotionally Connecting, Family   0 Comment Read More

The Awakened Family (Dr Shefali) Book Review

Every time I read a new book, its like forming a relationship and connection with an old friend.  I internalise the words and make it part of my life. I share the highs and lows of the content and ride the rollercoaster of emotions all with the end goal of changing, improving and growing as a person. No book has ever shaken me to the core to the extent of The Awakened Family by Dr Shefali. I am a huge fan and have read her earlier book, The Conscious Parent. There was something about the messages in this book that touched me in a place that I had long disconnected from and as a result old wounds opened and healing began.

(more…)

  Shenaaz Moos   Jan 03, 2017   Book Reviews, Conscious Parenting, Emotionally Connecting   0 Comment Read More

WHY CAN’T THEY JUST BE FRIENDS?…

I think that most of us have an unrealistic expectation or fantasy that our kids will just automatically be friends and we will all live happily ever after. Delusional LIES ….. Do you get along with all your siblings now as a grownup? Did you get along with them in childhood? If you are like me from a normal family – then your answer is NO!!!!

I think my struggle to accept my kids fighting may stem from my own unresolved sibling issues, I will get into that in another post. This post is inspired by the latest book I am reading by Dr Laura Markham called Calm Parents, Happy Siblings, I have had it for months but didn’t get around to reading it.

When I got to page 9, I made my first meme. See below and felt it needed to be a post.

(more…)

  Shenaaz Moos   Dec 14, 2016   Conscious Parenting, Emotionally Connecting, Family   0 Comment Read More

Why saying ‘I love you, but I don’t like you’ damages Self Esteem?

I have a book on my Kindle, ‘Liking the Child You Love’ by Jeffrey Bernstein I am dying to read as this topic is an important one to explain to parents when trying to help them bridge the canyon of disconnect between them and their child.

Parents often carelessly say that they love their child but don’t like them. This is extremely hurtful and gut wrenching for a child to hear. Love is not a tangible, measurable entity but like or dislike is often something easily detected. Saying ‘I love you!’ often, but it is evident that you don’t like your child will cause them to feel unloved.

(more…)

  Shenaaz Moos   Nov 27, 2016   Conscious Parenting, Family   0 Comment Read More

I WAS ALWAYS AUTHENTIC, NOT RUDE!  

When I was growing up, I was the child who was considered rude, cheeky and outspoken. This label stuck with me throughout my life, making me feel different, but never less than anyone else. I was lucky and the reason for this was my amazing dad who nurtured my self- esteem with his love and parenting and gave me the armour to withstand criticism. Now in my 40’s, I have the insight and wisdom to understand that I was always Authentic, which is why I never fit in and was out of sync with the world. Speaking my mind, being true to myself, having principles and standing up for myself was who I was.

 

When I read Brene Brown’s book ‘The Gifts of Imperfection,’ I realised that my Authentic self was compromised by my Perfectionist self and in order to completely embrace my authenticity, I had to confront the aspects of myself that I didn’t like but needed to accept. The challenge was to figure out if society is still dictating to me, or to trust and follow my inner compass.

(more…)

  Shenaaz Moos   Nov 16, 2016   Authenticity, Conscious Parenting, Whole Hearted Living   2 Comments Read More