Family

WHY DO I NEED SELF CARE?

WHY DO I NEED SELF CARE?

By Shenaaz Moos

Last month, I went to the hairdresser the day before Eid as a treat to myself. As I was paying, I said to the receptionist that I will be adding this to my self-care routine and she looked puzzled and asked “What’s that?” So I proceeded to explain that : Self-care is any activity that we do deliberately in order to take care of our mental, emotional, and physical health. (Psychcentral) She inspired me to post the self care principles listed below as I realised so many people out there may not what self-care is and why they need it . 

 

 

 

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  Shenaaz Moos   Jul 26, 2018   Authenticity, Consciousness, Family, SELF CARE, Whole Hearted Living   0 Comment Read More

SMACKING IS ILLEGAL, ITS TIME TO BECOME A CONSCIOUS PARENT!

Conscious Parenting provides an alternative to smacking your child, which has now become illegal in South Africa.  Judge Raylene Keightley passed the ground-breaking ruling in the Gauteng High Court  in October 2017 encouraging parents to find alternative methods of discipline.

Conscious Parenting advocates gentle positive discipline that sees the child as an individual. According to Dr Shefali Tsabary (Author of The Conscious Parent) A Conscious Parent is not one who seeks to fix her child or seek to produce the perfect child. This is not about Perfection! A conscious parent understands that this journey has been undertaken and this child had been called forth to raise the parent itself, to show the parent where the parent has yet to grow. This is why we call our children into our lives. It may seem a daunting task to confront the self, but this is the portal to your authenticity.  (more…)

  Shenaaz Moos   Dec 31, 2017   Authenticity, Conscious Parenting, Family   0 Comment Read More

POTHOLES AND CRACKED IPHONES

You are probably wandering what potholes and cracked phone screens have in common. They are both imperfections and are very much in your face. Once I noticed one pothole in my road, the others just became visible and every time I left my house they taunted me. I was forced to endure a cracked phone for a month and was a true test of my evolution as a recovering perfectionist.

The general definition by WIKI is “Perfectionists strain compulsively and unceasingly toward unobtainable goals, and measure their self-worth by productivity and accomplishment. Pressuring oneself to achieve unrealistic goals inevitably sets the person up for disappointment. Perfectionists tend to be harsh critics of themselves when they fail to meet their standards.”

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  Shenaaz Moos   Oct 22, 2017   Conscious Parenting, Family, Perfectionism   0 Comment Read More

IS IT TOO LATE TO SAY SORRY?

The answer is No, it’s never too late to say sorry. I know it is a Justin Bieber song but also the title of this blog post which I felt was an important one to share.  I wish I had the knowledge I have now when my teens were younger, but unfortunately ten years ago I didn’t and as a result made many, many and many more mistakes as a parent. When we parent from an unconscious place, we have no road map providing us with guidance to ensure that we don’t harm, scar and damage our children in our effort to raise balanced healthy adults one day. I can only forgive myself and try to do better with the knowledge I have in the present moment.

 

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  Shenaaz Moos   Mar 16, 2017   Conscious Parenting, Emotionally Connecting, Family   0 Comment Read More

‘Things I Wish I’d Known Before I Got (Gary Chapman) Book Review

When I was faced with many clients struggling with marital issues I knew that I needed to read or listen to this book on my reading list. Not only did I gain knowledge for them but learnt a thing or two to help me in my own marriage. As young married people we enter into a marriage from a place of blissful ignorance thinking love will get us through any challenge. Until a life stressor like job loss, illness, death of a family member or child shakes our foundation to the core.

Gary Chapman writes a relatable and humorous book with all his own real life marriage mistakes that just makes the content concrete. There are twelve chapters and each enlightened me further into the many reasons why marriages can fail and crumble very early on in the union. I will list them all and give you my the lesson I took away.

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  Shenaaz Moos   Feb 08, 2017   Book Reviews, Emotionally Connecting, Family   2 Comments Read More

How Teachers Impact Self Esteem of A Child

My youngest son (9) came  home from school distressed twice last week, but wouldn’t say why. When he was ready to share the reason I almost went into overprotective mommy mode. His teacher had negatively commented  on his handwriting once and used his ‘cursive’ as the bad example the second time. His anxious temperament needs critical feedback to be given in a nurturing, positive way and in private. He told me he cried in the bathroom and had been clenching his fists in class in anger.

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  Shenaaz Moos   Jan 25, 2017   Emotionally Connecting, Family, Self Esteem   0 Comment Read More

WHY CAN’T THEY JUST BE FRIENDS?…

I think that most of us have an unrealistic expectation or fantasy that our kids will just automatically be friends and we will all live happily ever after. Delusional LIES ….. Do you get along with all your siblings now as a grownup? Did you get along with them in childhood? If you are like me from a normal family – then your answer is NO!!!!

I think my struggle to accept my kids fighting may stem from my own unresolved sibling issues, I will get into that in another post. This post is inspired by the latest book I am reading by Dr Laura Markham called Calm Parents, Happy Siblings, I have had it for months but didn’t get around to reading it.

When I got to page 9, I made my first meme. See below and felt it needed to be a post.

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  Shenaaz Moos   Dec 14, 2016   Conscious Parenting, Emotionally Connecting, Family   0 Comment Read More

Why saying ‘I love you, but I don’t like you’ damages Self Esteem?

I have a book on my Kindle, ‘Liking the Child You Love’ by Jeffrey Bernstein I am dying to read as this topic is an important one to explain to parents when trying to help them bridge the canyon of disconnect between them and their child.

Parents often carelessly say that they love their child but don’t like them. This is extremely hurtful and gut wrenching for a child to hear. Love is not a tangible, measurable entity but like or dislike is often something easily detected. Saying ‘I love you!’ often, but it is evident that you don’t like your child will cause them to feel unloved.

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  Shenaaz Moos   Nov 27, 2016   Conscious Parenting, Family   0 Comment Read More